Camped Out Read online

  Duncan is now convinced he has a beetle in his ear. He covers both of his ears with his hands and starts rocking back and forth. I feel everyone staring. It must be weird for them to see a tall teenager bawling like a baby.

  “Maybe he should go back to camp to have the nurse look at him,” Rick says. “Ainslie, you know the route well. Would you mind taking them back?”

  “Sure,” Ainslie says. “I don’t mind.”

  “I could go too,” Jen says. “Might be good to have an extra person. Where it’s dark and everything.”

  “No, I think they’ll be fine,” Rick says. “I’ll let Cole know where you’ve gone.”

  Jen looks mad, but I pretend not to notice. I’m kind of glad she’s not coming. I don’t want Ainslie thinking I like her.

  The sounds of crickets and an owl hooting off in the distance keep the three of us company as we trudge back in the dark. I let Duncan hold one of the flashlights. He spends more time flicking it around than helping us watch for roots we might trip on. He’s unusually quiet.

  We knock on the infirmary door a few times before the nurse finally opens it.

  “Aren’t you supposed to be on a camping trip?” she asks, rubbing her eyes.

  “He’s got something in his ear,” I say. “We couldn’t calm him down.”

  “Come on inside,” she says, flicking on lights. “Okay, Duncan, let’s have a look.”

  Duncan sits perfectly still while she uses a little flashlight to look into his ears. “I don’t see anything,” she says finally. “Whatever was in there is gone now.” She kneels down and holds on to Duncan’s hands. “You okay?”

  “Spider-Man’s fine,” he says.

  I glance over at Ainslie and give her a Are you kidding me? look, but she doesn’t seem bothered.

  So back to the campsite we go. Ainslie talks nonstop with Duncan while I have a conversation in my head with Mom about what a pain he’s being. When Duncan starts to complain, Ainslie distracts him by singing camp songs.

  There is a full moon, which makes it super easy to see our way along the path and over the tracks. As we get close to our campsite, we hear something ahead of us that makes us all jump. Ainslie screams and grabs my arm. I whirl my flashlight toward the water. All the horror movies Ian and I’ve watched flash before my eyes. Standing in the water a couple of feet from the shore is a spooky figure with an eerie glow lighting up its face.

  Duncan spreads his fingers wide apart and yells, “Go away!”

  The figure doesn’t move. What if someone escaped from a nearby prison? Without looking back, I drag Ainslie and Duncan as fast as I can along the path to our campsite. When Ainslie lets go of my hand, it feels strangely empty.

  “Everything okay?” Cole asks. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

  We tell him what happened. He smiles.

  “It’s not funny!” Ainslie says. “Some crazy person is out there!”

  I hear a voice behind me. “Relax,” Ian says, laughing. “It’s just me! I pulled the classic ‘flashlight under the chin’ on ya! You guys are so gullible.”

  “Oh my god! I could kill you!” Ainslie says. “My heart is racing so fast. I am so going to get you back.”

  “Ian, you were supposed to look out for them,” Cole says. “Not scare the crap out them.”

  “I want to go home,” Duncan whines.

  Chapter Nine

  Ever since the overnight, Duncan has been saying he wants to go home. Right now we’re in the cabin for rest period, and he’s going on and on about not liking camp while he twists the head of his Spider-Man toy around and around. It doesn’t help that he’s got mosquito bites all over his body. He won’t stop scratching them.

  Now that I’m having fun, he wants to go home. And if he goes home, I’ll have to go too. Why does he always have to mess things up?

  Ainslie pokes her head in the cabin. Duncan perks up.

  “I like Ainslie,” he mumbles.

  I lean over the railing of my bunk. “Hey,” I say to her. Why can’t I come up with something better?

  “Hey,” she says back.

  I climb down the ladder. An awkward silence fills the cabin—that is, until Kenny says, “Ainslie? What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into the bar?”

  “I don’t know,” she says, smiling at me.

  “I’m looking for the guy who shot my paw.”

  We both smile.

  Then Ian, Heather and Jen barge into the cabin, laughing. “We’ve got the best skit for tonight!” Jen says. “But we need you, Max.” She grabs my arm and drags me out of the cabin.

  I glance back at Ainslie and hear her say, “Okay, guys. We have to come up with a skit.”

  Skit night is hilarious. When it’s my cabin’s turn, I feel a bit funny about not helping out. My skit is right after them, so I watch from the side. I have no clue what they’re going to do. Ainslie and Cole help everyone get into their places. Duncan sits at a table with Philip, Sam is dressed liked Elvis, and Kenny stands at the microphone. Bella is wearing an apron and holds a tray of glasses, pretending to wait on the tables.

  Ainslie holds up a sign that says Little Cove Café. Cole leans into the microphone.

  “Welcome to open-mic night at the Little Cove Café. First up we have the best joke teller around. Give it up for Mr. Kenny!”

  The room breaks out in applause and whistles after each joke. When Kenny is done, he bows, and then Cole approaches the microphone again. “Thank you, Mr. Kenny. You’re a very funny guy. Up next, all the way from Graceland, it’s the King of Rock ’n’ Roll!” Sam takes the microphone and sings a couple of Elvis tunes, complete with his bang-on impersonation. Everyone laughs at his finale when he tries to do the splits but then can’t get up. In the background, Bella the Waitress flirts with the audience, blowing kisses and sashaying across the stage. From the sidelines, Ainslie redirects her toward Duncan and Philip. She pretends to take their orders, but the crowd starts chanting, “We want Spider-Man! We want Spider-Man!” A big grin spreads across Duncan’s face.

  He stands up and puts his right arm in the air with his fingers spread apart, but then doesn’t know what to do. They keep chanting. He starts biting his hand and twirling around in a circle. Uh-oh. I know what that means. I rush onto the stage, forgetting that I’m dressed like a baby, giant diaper and all. The room booms with laughter.

  “I want to go home,” Duncan wails.

  Cole quickly steps up to the microphone. “How about a round of applause for the gang at the Little Cove Café! Now let’s give the next act a few minutes to get ready.” The curtains quickly close.

  “We’re on next!” Jen shouts from across the stage. “Max! We need you!”

  “Yeah, a little busy,” I reply. “Might need a second.” Can’t she see I’m dealing with a stage-four meltdown? Duncan’s still spinning but has now started to shriek and slap his ears. I stay close to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself. “It’s okay, Duncan. No one was laughing at you. It was me they were laughing at.” I remove his hands from his ears. “Look at what I’m wearing!” Duncan won’t look directly at me, but I see him glance sideways.

  “You look like a baby,” he whimpers.

  “I’m so sorry, Max,” Ainslie says, rushing over. “I should have shut it down after Elvis.”

  “It’s not your fault.”

  “Max? You coming?” Jen shouts.

  “I’ll take care of Duncan,” says Ainslie.

  “You sure?”

  “Yes. Go. Go. Come on, Duncan. That brother of yours looks pretty silly with that diaper on, doesn’t he?”

  She totally gets it.

  The curtains open again. Ian and I are sitting at a table with our arms behind us. A glass of milk and a bowl of cereal are in front of each of us. Heather and Jen have a white sheet over them to hide the fact that they are standing behind us. Jen slips her arms on either side of me and pretends they are my arms. She fumbles around the table, searching for the glass. “To the r
ight,” I whisper. She finally finds it with her right hand and then uses her left hand to find my mouth. Everyone laughs when milk spills all over me.

  Heather is doing no better with Ian. The spoon hits his forehead and his cheek several times before landing in his mouth. Out of the corner of my eye I see Duncan. I feel bad. I should have done the skit with him. I should be the one trying to help him calm down now. I glance out at the laughing crowd as a mouthful of cereal gets jammed into my mouth. I can’t wait for this skit to be over.

  Chapter Ten

  A couple of days later I get a letter from Mom.

  Dear Max,

  I hope you’re having a good time and that Duncan is too. I’m really looking forward to coming to the family-fun day next week. Derek is going to come for the drive because he’s worried about me going by myself. Isn’t that sweet of him?

  Great. As soon as Duncan sees Mom, he’s going to want to go home. When I get to the part about Derek coming too, I don’t bother reading any more.

  Today is family-fun day, and rain and thundershowers are in the forecast. Duncan is super excited about seeing Mom, but it really bothers me when he talks about Derek too. “I like Derek,” he whispers to himself while getting dressed. “I miss Mom.” Pause. “I love Dad,” he adds. He keeps repeating this over and over while I help him turn his shirt around. The guy just can’t get it right no matter how many times I show him the tag in the back.

  All morning Duncan paces back and forth on the pavilion verandah, watching the road. At the first sight of a car pulling in, he starts jumping up and down.

  “Where’s the Batmobile?” he shouts.

  “I don’t know,” I say, scanning all the cars that now fill the field. Where is she? Then I spot Mom and Derek walking across the field hand in hand. Seriously?

  Then Duncan spots them. “I’m here!” he yells from the top of the stairs. His right hand is in the air with his fingers spread apart. “Spider-Man’s up here!”

  Mom notices and waves. Derek has a stupid toothy grin plastered from ear to ear and is waving like a lunatic.

  “Mom, I’m at camp,” Duncan says.

  “I know, honey. We came to visit you.” Mom gives Duncan a hug and then reaches for me.

  I’m still mad at her for bringing Dork Nuts. I barely hug her. Her face falls. I feel bad.

  “How’s it going, Max?” Derek asks me after high-fiving Duncan.

  “Fine,” I mumble.

  “Oh, that’s good. I loved camp when I was your age. Sure brings back memories being here.” When I don’t say anything in return, he keeps up with the small talk. “I sure hope the weather lets up for you guys.”

  “Oh, we’re not going to let a little weather dampen our spirits, are we?” Ben says. He’s coming up the stairs with an armful of equipment.

  “Absolutely not,” Derek says. “We city folks can handle a drop or two.” Then he snort-laughs in his super-annoying way.

  “Well, I’m glad you guys made it out today. Max can show you around while we get lunch ready.”

  “Spider-Man will show you,” Duncan says. “Follow me.”

  “Could you make a little bit of an effort to be nice to Derek?” Mom whispers as we walk behind them.

  “Yup,” I say, keeping my eyes on the ground.

  Duncan leads us to the back of the dining hall where the artwork and camp photos are displayed. He points to pictures of him in the canoe, jumping off the dock, eating ice cream and painting in the arts-and-crafts room. I am relieved he hasn’t mentioned anything about going home yet.

  “Boy, you’ve been busy,” Mom says, admiring one of Duncan’s paintings. Derek puts one arm over Mom’s shoulder and the other over Duncan’s as he squeezes in to get a better look. It’s like they don’t even notice I’m here. Everything is always about Duncan.

  I’m about to show Mom what I’ve been doing when a piercing whistle sounds.

  It startles Mom, and she grabs Derek’s arm, then laughs.

  “That’s just Bella,” I say. “She’s telling us lunch is ready.”

  The noise level in the dining hall shoots up as everyone finds a spot to sit. It’s pouring outside now, and we can hear the rain beating against the roof. I introduce my cabinmates. Kenny immediately starts telling Mom and Derek every joke he knows. I feel bad for him because his family wasn’t able to come. But then he refers to Derek as my dad.

  “He’s not my dad!”

  The whole table goes silent. Kenny’s face falls, and I can feel Mom glaring at me.

  “You wouldn’t know that, dear,” she gently says to Kenny. “I’d love to hear another joke.”

  “I’m sorry, Kenny,” I say. I mean it. I really didn’t mean to snap at him.

  Kenny is quiet for a minute and then says, “How do you make a Kleenex dance?”

  “I dunno. How?”

  “Put a little boogie in it.”

  I shake my head and smile. “You got me.”

  Toward the end of lunch I notice that Derek, who’s talking to Cole, has both of his elbows on the table. I can’t help myself. “Derek! Derek!” I shout. “Get your elbows off the table!”

  “Max!” Mom says. “What are you doing?”

  “It’s a camp thing, Mom. Relax.”

  Mom frantically looks around as the rest of the dining hall joins in chanting Derek’s name. He stands up. But he doesn’t look mad or embarrassed. He laughs and shrugs his shoulders as if he knows what to expect. Someone shouts, “Sing a song!”

  Mom grabs his hand. “Are you okay with this?”

  “Oh, don’t worry about me,” he says. “It’s all coming back.” As he passes me, he squeezes my shoulders. “Are you sure you want to hear me sing?” he says to the room, like he’s one of the counselors.

  “Yes!” everyone shouts.

  “All right then,” he says, rubbing his hands together. “Let me think…oh, I’ve got a good one.” He starts to sing.

  “My momma don’t wear no socks!”

  Everyone in the room replies at the top of their voices: “A ding-dong!”

  “I seen where she took them off!”

  “A ding-dong!”

  My mouth is hanging open. What is happening?

  Chapter Eleven

  “I bet you didn’t expect that, eh?” Ian says.

  “He’s still a jerk,” I say, scraping food into the bin.

  “Who’s a jerk?” Ainslie asks, bringing more plates to scrape.

  “My mom’s boyfriend.”

  “Really? The guy who got up and sang?” She looks over to where Mom and Derek are talking with Ben. “I must be missing something. He seems nice.”

  “Yeah, well…” I don’t have a good comeback. Anything I say right now is going to make me look like a jerk. “It’s kind of hard to explain.”

  Once the dishes are cleared, we start moving the tables to the side of the dining hall so we can use the space for activities. I glance out the window. I’ve never seen it rain so hard. So much for showing Mom the high ropes course or my archery skills. We’re stuck inside. We play a few games. Some of the families leave early, but Mom and Derek stick it out to the bitter end.

  “Max, thanks for letting me join your Mom today,” Derek says to me while Mom is giving Duncan a goodbye hug. He puts his hand on my shoulder. “She misses you guys.”

  I shove my hands in my pockets so he doesn’t notice my clenched fists. What is wrong with him? Doesn’t he get that I just don’t like him?

  “So I’ll see you soon,” Mom says, kissing me on the cheek. “Don’t look so glum. That was fun today, even if the weather wasn’t on our side.”

  “I guess.”

  I watch them make their way to his little sports car, trying not to slip or get totally drenched in the process. I should be happy that Duncan didn’t talk about going home, but seeing Mom and Derek together bums me out. I don’t bother watching them drive away.

  “Weather getting to you?” Ben asks, joining me out on the verandah of the pavilion.


  “Something like that,” I mutter.

  “Listening to the rain beating on the roof is one of my favorite sounds,” Ben says, leaning against the railing. “But it’s getting to me too.” He changes the subject. “So did you have a good visit with your mom?”

  I look away from the field and cross my arms. “Not really. She was too busy with—”

  “Well, looks like you might get a longer visit,” Ben interrupts.

  I turn around. Mom and Derek are running toward us. They’re covered in mud, and their clothes are soaked.

  “Road gave out on us!” Derek says between breaths. “Right at the creek.”

  Mom looks terrified. She’s shivering. “It was really scary,” she adds, sniffing back tears.

  “Max, run to the infirmary and grab some blankets,” Ben says, then holds out his hand for Mom as she climbs the stairs. “Come on inside. Let’s get you guys warmed up.”

  I tear down the stairs and dash across the field, sloshing through wet grass and dodging mud puddles. The rain is bucketing down. I’m completely soggy—sneakers and all—by the time I get to the infirmary.

  “Whoa, that’s quite a mess you’re leaving on my floor there, mister,” the nurse says, putting down her book. “What’s the emergency?”

  “I need blankets,” I say. “My mom and her…creek…road…” I’m talking so fast I’m not making sense. The nurse tells me to breathe. She eventually gets the story out of me and hands me a bag with blankets.

  By the time I make it back to the pavilion, Mom and Derek aren’t there. “Where are they?” I ask.

  “Changing out of their wet clothes,” Ainslie says. “Ben went to scrounge up something for them to wear. They’re both pretty shaken up.” She looks me up and down. “You don’t look so good yourself. You’re soaked!” She grabs a blanket from the bag I’m holding and wraps it around me.

  “So the good news is,” Ben says to Mom and Derek, who are drinking big mugs of coffee, “Buddy down the road just looked at your car. He’s pretty sure he can get at it once the rain stops. The bad news is that the road won’t be open again until tomorrow. Looks like you guys are spending the night.”